In my work I sometimes think “change” is a four-letter word, because so often clients wince when I say that word. I am in the business of change and that is the primary reason people come to see me, so why do people cringe at the word “change?” Ultimately because change or changing can feel like a loss of control, and frankly we don’t like to admit the following; we want control of our lives and seek control in a multitude of ways. We create illusions and expectations of how things “should be” and like to think we have much more say in matters than we really do. So when things change it is a big reminder that we don’t have that much control.

Not to sound all doom and gloom, there is the good part, we may not have control over change, however we have control over how we experience change. Hallelujah! This means we can work on how we view change how we handle change.

How do we get better at handling change? Our ability or skills for change is like a muscle that we have to work out, most of us don’t like change in the first place so we ignore our “change muscle.” We have to build strength and resiliency in our under-used muscle. We can do that by taking better care of ourselves health-wise, by avoiding negative people, and by finding a place in your life you do feel a sense of control or order. For some people that can be as simple as doing something like cleaning your house so you feel that you are the master of your domain. It is also important to not view change as something to put your life on hold for, such as I will do “x” when this change thing gets over, keep living your life. Reach out to others for support, remind yourself of your accomplishments, and keep engaging in other positive areas in your life. Above all remember, change is a constant in life, the more you can accept that, embrace change and roll with what life gives you then the easier change is.